adventures in the life of miriam

Ten years ago, it was early 1996. Take this survey, repost the results in your journal, and (others can) see how many things have changed since then.

1) How old were you?
13

2) What grade were you in?
7th

3) Where did you go to school?
home

4) Where did you work?
didn't have a job

5) Where did you live?
el cerro mission, outside of los lunas, nm... (sings)*in the ghetto*

6) How was your hair style?
i had shoulder length hair with no bangs... weird... i like not having that much hair now that i think of it...

7) Did you wear braces?
no

8) Did you wear contacts?
no, but i was fascinated by my friends that did...

9) Did you wear glasses?
sometimes...

10) Who was your best friend?
either jenise wilson or deborah griffith.

11) Who was your boyfriend/girlfriend?
didn't have a boyfriend... i wasn't old enough according to my parents rules (which were easy to keep, i might add, cause i was a dyke!)

12) Who was your celebrity crush?
lucy lawless

13) Who was your regular-person crush?
no one really interested me.

14) Were you a virgin?
yes.

15) How many piercings did you have?
2. my ears.

16) How many tattoos did you have?
none, but was always looking at tattoo flash and modifying it to make tat's that i'd want in the future.

17) What was your favorite band/singer/rapper?
louis armstrong... still is.

18) Had you smoked a cigarette yet?
no.

19) Had you gotten drunk or high yet?
drunk yes, on buttery nipples with my brother and sister, who thought it would be funny to feed a 12 year old shots while my parents looked on and laughed as i asked everyone in the room if they thought it was getting hotter by the minute.
high no.

20) Had you driven yet?
yes, the green volvo named gumby.

22) Which of your pets were still alive?
freckles the old smiling dog, derrick the cat, and fred and ethel the lovebirds.

23) Looking back, are you where you thought you would be?
not at all. i wanted to be a rockstar by now.

24) If you could change one thing from the past 10 years what would it be?
i would have kept my dad alive long enough to get to meet my beautiful niece and nephew.

went to work dreading the day that i knew today was going to be. got on the phones at 8:09, first call of the day was a woman telling me what an awful person i was because i refused to give her a free cell phone. first break at 10:31 was far too short. one o'clock came, i started counting down minutes and fighting back tears. one thirty one, i logged out and headed outside, trying to keep up my composure. it worked, till i sat down in the car. i felt the empty sadness creeping up from my stomach, and i did everything that i could to push it down. i've never felt so many things all at once. i take that back, but it's been 4 years since i've felt this way, and it wasn't the same. we arrive at the church, i see people that i know, and i walk up to the front of the sanctuary to get a piece of paper folded three times with pictures of kimber on it. it hurts to see her smile, i think to myself, but i still push the feelings away. the service goes on, man at front talking about someone that he only met a couple of times, telling us all "what do you think?" when the issue of kimber's eternity came into question amongst his ramblings about fighter pilots in ww2 and charred hens covering 10 chicks. i think to myself the whole time about things that we did when i knew kimber. i remember her laugh, and how much fun she was to hang out with. i also remember times that i said things that hurt her, and how i'll never get the chance to apologize for criticizing how she did things sometimes. i remembered kimber, and honored the memories that i have of her. the first moment of clarity that i've had thru this whole shitty day. then the service is over, her family stands at the front, and i feel awkwardly out of place. i don't feel right going up and saying "i partied with your family member, and we painted on the wall at reuben's apartment once." it just didn't fit. so i walked outside, and told james, reuben, and drew what i remembered. then i left. went back to work, dreading the rest of the day, had to stay till 8 instead of 7 tonight, due to my 2 hour lunch. no one really noticed that i was gone, or my tear-stained face and bloodshot eyes. i don't know why this is all hitting me so hard right now, i think to myself at my desk. then the phone beeps, and i half-heartedly answer the phone and argue with someone over something as trivial as a five cent charge on their bill. "it's the principal of the thing" he says, i think, if you had any principles, you wouldn't be busting my balls for a nickel." got off work at 8, came home and finally got to break down. it's been a rough day, but i'm alive.

five minutes ago, i received a call from our former roommate, kari. she let me know that a mutual friend of ours, kimber, passed away last night. i'm at a loss for words right now, and i can't figure out if the shaking inside is because my house is freezing right now, or if it has something to do with the tears that are trickling down my flushed red cheeks. i remember the night that i met kimber. i was hanging out with dez and nish, at dez's mom's house, and kimber was there. i remember being intrigued by the tattoo that she had around her wrist, stars and moons. i asked about it and she told me about how interested she was in the stars and constillations. we all sat outside on the sidewalk for some time drinking beer and talking about life, then we watched foxfire, which i'd never seen before. it all seems so trivial now, but i'm glad that i have that memory to look back on. it's been a long time since i'd seen her, (about a year and a half ago) and the last time that i saw her, we met up at o'neil's for a red stripe, and later went to exhale and hung out. we talked that night about life again, and how we both had grown since the last time that we talked. it's sad to think that i'll never get to talk to her again, and that bug will never see her mom again. losing people has a profound effect on one's life, and even before she was lost, kimber had effect on mine. she truly was one of a kind, and i'm sure that her energy will forever be reflected in the stars flung ever so carefully throughout the nighttime sky.

i cleaned our office today, to get it ready for ace & lisa, (the chicks we met at the tattoo shop at pride, who live in fort collins, co.) who are coming down for balloon fiesta, and crashing at our pad. we've been talking back and forth with them since pride, and it's gonna be fun to have friends come stay for a few days. later on in the day, i cleaned the living room, and then took a short nap till about ten till six, when i woke up and started dinner (my night to cook), i made some turkeyburger helper (crunchy nacho... yummy!) and then washed dishes. i actually feel like a real live grown up... no one telling me to clean up constantly, but doing it just because i like having a clean house... my inner child hates me right now, but that's ok, i'm gonna go feed the inner child with some cartoons now. then tomorrow i get to spend the day with jessica and logan, my niece and nephew... i'm kinda scared that something bad will happen, but i have to trust myself in the fact that i've watched each of them before, just not together. i will survive! hahaha... off to bed.

hooray! the sky opened up today and rained down cable internet on me!!! first, i was awakened by the sound of my phone ringing, then the voice of unnamed cable guy asking to be here in 15 mins! hell yeah! i'll be here and awake in 15 mins! and he was here in 8. for the first time ever, a cable guy was early, and got done really quick. i think that had something to do with the computer's wallpaper rainbow colored with "camp dyke", (as we've come to lovingly refer to our home,) written all over it. anyway, i finally have internet again! i don't have to go to my mom & sisters to use their computers anymore! (but i would like to thank them for the use of the computer which was the soul reason that i work at t-mobile and annie at ucc dental.) i guess i'm trying to say that it will be really nice to get back in touch with so much that i've missed. i don't know why i'm so excited about missing drama, flamewars, and the like, sometimes humans just need to see that they're not the only ones with stupid shit happening in their lives. and now, i go to my friends list to spread the good word! yay! i have internet again!!!! (happy little dance)

since my last visit to this crazy world of online drama and wonderful way of keeping track of people i've lost touch with, there has been an incredible ammount of things happening in my life. i'm still with the same girl that i was the last time that i posted, shocking, i know. i finally found love, happiness and everything that i longed for. my family gets along with her, and i love her to pieces. everything just kinda fell into place, and i've been incredibly fulfilled. the reason for this post is that my sister posted a funny little reply from my live journal telling me to come back. i decided to do what my journal was telling me. anyway, the reason that my posts are so sporadic is that i don't have a computer with access to the internet at my home. i'd love to have everyone that i haven't seen in awhile over for what has become one of our (me & annie's) "famous" bbq's one of these sundays. i really miss everyone, and would love to share my happiness with everyone.
thanks for reading,
~miriam~

hmm.. haven't done this thingie in awhile, but yeah.
so since i've posted last, i've done some drag performances, as kaleb gordon (my drag king name), found a really great girlfriend, gone thru alot of shit, and somehow managed to keep my job.
yeah... go me.
anyway, went to pulse last night, had a blast, seeing as how i hadn't been there in over a month, got to hug and talk with a shitload of people that i hadn't seen in forever, and then went home.
finally, i've got another performance at amc (albuquerque mining company on louisiana and central) on the 16th of this month, at 9ish pm.
be there !!! come support me!!!
later alligators,
~miriam~

the new apartment is great... freedom is fun.
if anyone needs to get ahold of me, just call my cell (203.8843), since i no longer have constant access to a computer.
now to the interesting news...
as many of you know, albuquerque gay pride is on the 12th of this month, and i'm definitely gonna be there... crazy part starts here:
i'm gonna be performing at pride with the guys & dollz drag group
... as a drag king...

no fuckin shit.
anyway, just thought i'd drop in a note to say hey and let you know the exciting news...
~miriam~

almost done packing all my shit... can't wait to get into my new apt. mom bought me a microwave last night, and also said that she's gonna get me some groceries too... which totally fucking rocks!
anyway, i've gotta get going... family day at pine flat where my dad's ashes are.
~miriam~

so... haven't posted in here in awhile.
anyway, i've been chillin, mostly working my ass off, and occasionally swimming with my niece, which is fun, except when you're as white as me and you burn to a nice red crisp. anyway, work is going great. i've been drawing signs for the store latley, and the owner pulled me aside before closing last week, to tell me that he was considering me for the position of store designer. so i started doing a display, and already had the signs up on the bags, when he came out and pulled me aside and asked what i was doing, and informed me that i needed to give him a proposal for the signs before putting them up. so, being the spiteful bitch that i am, i turned 6 pages of descriptive goodness in to his inbox later on that day. the next morning, the operations manager pulled me aside the minute that i got there to tell me that they'd be hiring more people for the army/navy side of the store, which is where i'd been working, and that they'd decided to promote me to store designer, with a $.50 raise, with a definite possibility of another raise in the very near future. at the end of that day, the owner pulled me aside again to tell me that in the 25 years that he'd had that store, he'd never seen something as good as what i turned in to him. heh.... gotta love being a sarcastic spiteful bitch (and getting rewarded for it nonetheless...) fantastic.
anyway, that's all i feel like writing for now, cause the drama of last night was just too much to think about right now. grr.
~miriam~

when speaking of "entrapment" and how catherine zeta-jones looked scrumptious in it, drew bursts out:
"catherine zeta-jones' ass is so wonderful, that you could throw a handfull of change at her ass, and it would all bounce off and land on a tower..."
to which gwen replies:
"in order of denomination"
to which drew answers:
"and they would be all heads up."
~miriam~

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
"starbucks has a nice little drink called an iced tazo chai creme. it is remnant of an orgasm in one's mouth."
THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT, BROUGHT TO YOU BY LESBIANAVENGER RADIO.

went to a party last night, hung out with a bunch of lesbians (hooray!), got severely ripped, other stuff happened, yeah.. fun night.
anyway, i woke up this morning to a completely emtpy house, since my mom's watching kids this weekend (at their house), and my sister is watching my brother and sister-in-law's house for the weekend, cause they went to cali.
so i got out of bed, decided to have a kool-aid jammer (disappointing, cause it looks like a caprisun, but isn't nearly as sweet), and sat down at the computer to talk to a few people. then, i decided that since no one is here, i wanted to dance. and dance i did. actually, i just took a break from dancing, and more is sure to ensue after.
hooray for apb, and one (panzermench!), snog (hell yeah corporate slave!), mindless self indulgence, and ministry when volume is no worry.
anyway, off to dance some more... *tosses kool-aid jammer at gizmo*
~miriam~
*"shop as usual, and avoid panic buying..."*

so, went to club, had fun (when i wasn't being smothered by a chick that thinks that i like her, but i'm just too damn nice to say 'fuck off' to). saw a bunch of people that i hadn't seen in forever, like james and his trusty sidekick, danced my ass off for a bit with diva, gwen and sparky, which was much fun... then left. made an appearance at an afterparty that was byob, which was kinda useless since no one got the invites till during club, so there was no liquor there, but there was marijuana, so i was happy (and good marijuana at that). also, there were friends there. it's always fun to chill with sparky, paul, stevie (thanks for the ride),erin, and gabe (even though i left soon after he got there... i'm such a party pooper). ran into liz, who i thought had dropped from the face of the earth since i saw her last. hung out with a bunch more people that i didn't know, then decided to go home and go to bed (since i have to work at 10 am. as i type, it's 3:06 am), but not without jumping onto paul's truck and bouncing a couple of times, just for the fuck of it, then ending the night with the first thing that popped into my brain, "isn't it fun?". words to live by i tell you. anyway i should go get some sleep now.
~miriam~

so yeah... i'm tired, but it's good to finally have a weekday off. :)
it's cool though... i'm getting more hours this week than ever before, so there's no complaining going on here.
anyway, went to applebee's last night with luiza, had a good talk about all kinds of shit, came home, talked to dez for a bit, then went to bed. shit's been really strange lately. like homewise. my mom's been waking up every morning in a fighting mood, so things are kinda hectic. other than all that shit, i'm doing well. i really must convince myself to post more, but i just haven't had the time.
now i'm off to enjoy my day, and later do some laundry.
~miriam~

my sister likes to call me shithead. but i called her an asshole so we're even.
that is all.
~miriam~

so yeah... went to pulse last night and had a few drinks with my sister and her bf, then walked all over the club trying to find a familiar face, which didn't happen :( oh well. anyway, i got into the bar, so i was happy. i came out of the back of blu after last call to meet up with a running eladio (screaming at the top of his lungs, "happy birthday!") that actually made me feel alot better. then, i went to forrest's house with anthony and elliot, and crashed there after having some more to drink. anyway, tonight is round 2, i'll be at blu after awhile for a bit, if anyone wants to try buying me a drink for my b-day... :)
~miriam~

so, everyone is still more than welcome to drop by my house tonight, and bring whatever you want... i made some brownies, that are guaranteed not to last long, and there's some other stuff too.. the slight change in the plans is that we'll be watching movies... bring some if you want, or pick from mine. also available: nintendo (not gamecube, not 64, fuck that shit... old school nintendo... i'm talking NES bitches!) anyway, i digress...
come one come all... party with me, bring (booze!) whatever (booze!) you want to (booze!)...
~miriam~

so my mom left earlier this evening to spend the weekend with my aunt in bosque farms, so you all know what that means...

PARTY!!!!!

there will be a get together this saturday evening at my pad, but we need some liquor and 'party favors'
anyone interested in getting fucked the fuck up, give me a call (203.8843)

in other news...
i'm looking for a party this evening, and a place to crash... im me or call me and let me know if you know of any happenings. :)

later alligators
~miriam~

so, on the countdown, it's now 20 days till i'm 21 years old. *woo hoo!!*
not really sure what i'm gonna do, but i know it will involve getting drunk. :)
anyway, i'm gonna go watch tv now, and all that happy shit.
later,
~miriam~

so i went to smith's today, to get some ridiculously overpriced laundry detergent, and while i was walking out, i noticed a girl scout cookie table. now, normally, i'm not really for giving money to right wing organizations, but this is kids, and besides, i read in the paper earlier today that people are starting to boycott the girl scouts cause their organization gave some kind of award to planned parenthood for being a worthwhile cause and promoting sex ed in schools or some shit like that... but i digress.
anyway, ended up spending 6 bucks on a box of do-si-do's and a box of thin mints. as i was paying for the cookies, 2 of the little girls came up all wrapped up in one fleece jacket and attempted to freak me out by saying "we're an alien" in semi-unison (about half a second apart from each other). i laughed politely, and walked away wishing i was still a kid. now i sit here, munching on a do-si-do, reminiscing about stupid shit that i did as a kid. just thought i'd share my moment of brief entertainment for the day, hope someone gets as much of a kick out of it as i did.
~miriam~